It’s Going to Kill You…

If you don’t want to read my rant move on…

I’m tired of everything that I eat or come into contact with being able to kill me. And I don’t want to hear any “even too much water can kill you/ all things in moderation” bullshit because I don’t plan to drown myself or drink obscene quantities of water and I don’t add yucky chemicals intentionally as part of our diet…

I’m seriously starting to think that food is going to kill me.
Vegetables are great as long as they’re not night shades or sprayed with chemicals that made insects stomachs explode. Fruits are wonderful as long as they’re organic and not dried with sulfites or in the form or filtered, pasteurized juice.

Don’t eat any grains because they will kill you. If you do want something like rice once in a millennia it better be organic white rice because arsenic-loaded, pesticide-riddled brown rice with absolutely kill you! And forget beans or you can kiss you gut health goodbye. Even organic beans will screw you over with their diabolical leptin arsenal. Corn- don’t get me started. Soy- culinary gmo suicide!

Consuming dairy is food roulette. Assuming you are even capable of digesting lactose (chances are you’re not) you better make sure it’s from organic pasture raised cows who never ate soy or gmo corn and got story hour everyday. Anything else is sure to kill you. Otherwise, you might as well drink “regular” milk with unlabeled added sweetener to addict your brain. And if you want REAL eggs nothing short of free range, pasture raised, that never consumed soy/corn/mystery filler feed will do. Ideally they will also get story time and or spa treatments to reduce stress.

Meat. Just move to Switzerland and hunt your own in the wild. That’s what people who are serious about their health do. Canada will do in a pinch, but everyone is happier in Switzerland, including animals. Don’t take a risk with US meat! The beef is loaded with E. coli contamination and antibiotics. The chicken must be dipped in chlorine solution to make it safe to eat, but the processing facility really is clean right?! You can live dangerously and eat pork but, for the love of God don’t push it with nitrate/nitrite cured bacon or pork “products”. It will kill you of course! If you only kinda care about the humane treatment of animals you can eat fish. So long as it’s wild caught and just returned from vacation. So called sustainably farmed seafood is deplete of the nutrients it should contain and therefore a total waste of money. Do yourself a favor and just skip meat.

And unless you want to answer to the Supreme Court, your doctor and child social services avoid the following: SUGAR, msg, any “ingredient” with more than 7 letters or 4 syllables, artificial food coloring, artificial sweeteners, heavy metals, preservatives, salt (unless it’s pink AND Himalayan), chemically altered processed oils, etc.

You are left with a diet of über filtered water, organic wild Swiss meat, organic locally farmed seasonal fruits and vegetables, organic unrefined cold-pressed coconut oil and maybe some organic homegrown herbs and spices. If you stick to this diet you will have a super long healthy life! But eventually something is still going to kill you anyway! I’m betting it’s the legally allowed “safe levels” of water contaminants that store up in your liver. Or the toxic chemicals off-gassing from your mattress that you spend 25-33% of your life on. Maybe even the know carcinogenic chemicals put in your makeup, tampons, or sprayed on your clothes as flame retardants. Exhausting and frustrating isn’t it?!

Sincerely, a frustrated mom



About Cheryl

Twenty something SAHM to two beautiful babies!
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