Why I’m a “bad” mom…

By today’s standards I freely admit that I am probably considered a bad, lazy mom. Not in every department but several of them at least. Here’s why:

My kids don’t do activities. None. Not even one that’s free. No ballet class. No toddler time. No story hour at the library. There are three main reasons: I don’t want to have to bring them. I don’t want to waste money on activities. I believe that children should be kept close to home until they’re are ~8. They will not remember dance classes at 3yo and I’m not paying hundreds of dollars for you to not dance while I try to entertain 1 (soon to be 2) other kid at 9 am any day of the week. Screw that.

We don’t have big birthday parties. A typical bday party for my kids is immediate family (grandparents, aunts/uncles, and godparents). Bc we have a big family that’s still 25-30ppl if everyone can make it! Invite cousins and friends? Not happening. And no I don’t send home party favors bc it’s not your special day. Get over it. Plus every parent I know just wants to throw away that stupid bag of cheap ass toys anyway.

No, my daughter is not allowed to wear makeup or nail polish or earrings or anything sleeveless (without an undershirt). Some things are worth looking forward to. Earrings and spaghetti straps at one year old leads to makeup and nail polish at 5 then boyfriends at 10 to 16 and pregnant on mtv. Exaggeration? Maybe. Not gonna chance it.

Play dates? Yes we have them maybe 2x a month. And it’s more of a mommy date. MY friends come over and we complain about husbands, teething, sleep regressions and admit we might be pregnant again. The kids trash the living room and ask for snacks. Everyone leaves by 2 for naps and getting older kids home from school. It’s really rejuvenating for me to talk to another adult and everyone keeps urging me to take “me time” anyway.

I don’t have endless patience with my kids. That is not the real world and our job as parents is to prepare them for the real world gradually. My kids hear “no” more than they hear “yes”. And none of the “let’s find something else for your hands to do” bullshit. “Don’t touch that.” Ta-da! No misinterpretation there. I consider “knock it off. You’re pissing me off” to be a legitimate reason. As well as “stop whining. Nobody likes a whiney baby.” As a result, my kids rarely whine and do as they’re told most of the time. And they’re really happy kids! They’re not huddled in a corner traumatized bc they didn’t get their way or were told “bc I said so.”

Tv content is strict in our house. Admittedly, I have allowed too much quantity lately bc this pregnancy has made it difficult for me to function. However, content is not negotiable. They happily watch the same 3-4 shows repeatedly. She knows not to ask for anything Frozen. Spongebob-ayfkm?! Not happening. Here’s some Little Einsteins while mama sleeps next to the toilet.

And no, you don’t get a toy/treat just because we walked into a store. Stop whining about it. Nobody likes a whiney baby.

What makes you a “bad” mom?

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Sick Days…

On Sunday Zeta and I had bogger factory noses so I braced myself for the inevitable. Monday we both woke up with sore throats, stuffy noses, a little coughing, textbook cold symptoms. Today, we are a bit better and now Tau is where we were yesterday. In case you’re in our boat I thought I would share what our sick days look like.

A list of sick day necessities in our house:

YL essential oils! We apply symptomaticly but Thieves and lemon come out for every illness. This time we are also using RC in the diffuser and applying Breathe Again roll on for congestion. I always do thieves tea (tea, local raw honey, thieves, lemon) for sore throats.

Probiotics in the form of homemade water kefir and yogurt. Multivitamins also make the list.

Chicken noodle soup, preferably made with a batch of homemade bone broth and gluten free noodles.

Keto-sticks for Tau. Even if her blood sugar is great we still have to monitor ketone levels on sick days. If her ketones get too high it can cause kidney failure pretty quickly. Elevated ketones that we can’t flush out means a trip to the ER for iv fluids ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

Detox baths are also on my sick day list. We do a hot bath with one cup of Epsom salt, lavender oil, and magnesium flakes. I don’t soap them up or wash hair in this bath, it’s just for soaking and relaxing. And splashing!

Paper plates/bowls and plastic cutlery. Normally I refuse to use hot food and plastics but I give in on sick days because I don’t have time or energy to do a sink full of dishes. It also spares hubby from having to do them when he gets home so everybody wins.

Screens. Specifically ABC Mouse and Netflix. I’m not proud but I use the tools I have at my disposal on sick days! We watch marathons of Little Einsteins, Justin Time, Signing Time, Barefoot Contessa, DD&Ds, and MvF! It’s one of the very few times I encourage them to lay around on the couch and relax.

What do sick days looks like in your house?

 

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It’s Going to Kill You…

If you don’t want to read my rant move on…

 
I’m tired of everything that I eat or come into contact with being able to kill me. And I don’t want to hear any “even too much water can kill you/ all things in moderation” bullshit because I don’t plan to drown myself or drink obscene quantities of water and I don’t add yucky chemicals intentionally as part of our diet…

I’m seriously starting to think that food is going to kill me.
Vegetables are great as long as they’re not night shades or sprayed with chemicals that made insects stomachs explode. Fruits are wonderful as long as they’re organic and not dried with sulfites or in the form or filtered, pasteurized juice.

Don’t eat any grains because they will kill you. If you do want something like rice once in a millennia it better be organic white rice because arsenic-loaded, pesticide-riddled brown rice with absolutely kill you! And forget beans or you can kiss you gut health goodbye. Even organic beans will screw you over with their diabolical leptin arsenal. Corn- don’t get me started. Soy- culinary gmo suicide!

Consuming dairy is food roulette. Assuming you are even capable of digesting lactose (chances are you’re not) you better make sure it’s from organic pasture raised cows who never ate soy or gmo corn and got story hour everyday. Anything else is sure to kill you. Otherwise, you might as well drink “regular” milk with unlabeled added sweetener to addict your brain. And if you want REAL eggs nothing short of free range, pasture raised, that never consumed soy/corn/mystery filler feed will do. Ideally they will also get story time and or spa treatments to reduce stress.

Meat. Just move to Switzerland and hunt your own in the wild. That’s what people who are serious about their health do. Canada will do in a pinch, but everyone is happier in Switzerland, including animals. Don’t take a risk with US meat! The beef is loaded with E. coli contamination and antibiotics. The chicken must be dipped in chlorine solution to make it safe to eat, but the processing facility really is clean right?! You can live dangerously and eat pork but, for the love of God don’t push it with nitrate/nitrite cured bacon or pork “products”. It will kill you of course! If you only kinda care about the humane treatment of animals you can eat fish. So long as it’s wild caught and just returned from vacation. So called sustainably farmed seafood is deplete of the nutrients it should contain and therefore a total waste of money. Do yourself a favor and just skip meat.

And unless you want to answer to the Supreme Court, your doctor and child social services avoid the following: SUGAR, msg, any “ingredient” with more than 7 letters or 4 syllables, artificial food coloring, artificial sweeteners, heavy metals, preservatives, salt (unless it’s pink AND Himalayan), chemically altered processed oils, etc.

You are left with a diet of รผber filtered water, organic wild Swiss meat, organic locally farmed seasonal fruits and vegetables, organic unrefined cold-pressed coconut oil and maybe some organic homegrown herbs and spices. If you stick to this diet you will have a super long healthy life! But eventually something is still going to kill you anyway! I’m betting it’s the legally allowed “safe levels” of water contaminants that store up in your liver. Or the toxic chemicals off-gassing from your mattress that you spend 25-33% of your life on. Maybe even the know carcinogenic chemicals put in your makeup, tampons, or sprayed on your clothes as flame retardants. Exhausting and frustrating isn’t it?!

Sincerely, a frustrated mom

 

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Prepping for #3…

Now that we are getting down to the last few months before baby boy arrives I thought I would share some of our prep work.

After almost 2 years I had to kick Zeta out of our bed. Not only is my belly getting bigger, but Z sleeps in and X shape! So that had to end! We purchased some bunk beds and now our “big” kids have somewhere to sleep ๐Ÿ™‚ Once we have lived with them a few weeks I’ll let you know how we like them.

Another mini project was to purge and sort the baby clothes. I struggled with this project before I even started it. I asked several moms of many (since we hope to have many) what they did. I scoured blogs and Pinterest. I changed my mind 27x. Finally, I decided to go with our overall approach to stuff: less is more! So I heavily purged baby girl clothes. While I hope to have another girl at some point it is not practical to hold onto lots of girl clothes when this baby is a boy. We hope to avoid pregnancy for a year after each baby is born so at a minimum I would be storing baby girl clothes for another 3m of pregnancy, plus 12m of caring for a new baby boy, plus another 9m of pregnancy assuming that future baby was even another girl. That’s keeping clothes for another 24 months on the chance that I got pregnant at 13 months postpartum with a girl. To me that’s absurd! And knowing me I will want to go pick out a few new things anyway!

Obviously, I kept more boy things but not by much. And as a general rule I don’t save anything over 2T because it’s unlikely sizes/seasons will match up. And around that point kids start to have their own preferences and style so I ask their opinions when we need to fill gaps in wardrobe. The only exceptions to this rule are gowns (bc they’re so expensive) and snow gear like ski pants, heavy jackets, etc.

As far as vehicle prep goes, we upgraded to an ’09 7-seater Toyota Sienna. It is a dream! Huge trunk, dvd player, one door slides open automatically, and it has low miles! And to go with it we bought this new car seat for Zeta. He is currently in this infant seat that converts to a booster (rated for 5-65lbs). We already have a Pinnacle for Tau so we knew we would like it for Zeta. Baby 3 will go in the Marathon and the “big kids” will have similar Pinnacles ๐Ÿ™‚

As far as “preparing” the kids we haven’t done much. We always refer to him as OUR new baby and even when not pregnant we talk about how wonderful babies are how they are gifts from God to be treasured and thankful for! We did buy this book though ๐Ÿ™‚ย  I did not want the Baby Makes Five book because it is VERY negative for majority of the book and I didn’t want to chance Tau mimicking those behaviors. So far they seem very excited about their brother. Both love to kiss my belly and she talks about how they will give him hugs when he arrives.

Financially speaking, we paid for the birth in full in cash. We have also set aside money to pay for lip and tongue tie revision. Both of our kids needed it so we are assuming he will too. We had to pick a new pediatric dentist since our previous one retired. I have been emailing him to get details as far as insurance coverage and reimbursement.

All total, this baby will cost about $24,000, most of it being the vehicle. Since we now have a 7-seater costs should be considerably lower if we are blessed with a #4 in the future!

How do you prep for a baby?

 

 

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Sleep is for the Weak…

Reasons I can’t Sleep…

Zeta wakes up 536x a night

Tau wakes up for a drink almost every night at ~3:30am

Hubby is snoring too loudly

I have a tiny human training for the Olympics in my abdomen

I have to pee… again

I’m hungry and/or thirsty…again

My left leg must move (restless leg syndrome- yes it is a real thing and it really sucks. I am currently seeking relief in the form of magnesium glycinate supplements.)

Besides that, I’m golden! โค

What wakes you up at night?

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Insert Yawn…

I am very tired lately! Who would think that growing a human while chasing two toddlers and keeping a home functional would be exhausting?! Just keeping the day to day tasks up is enough to knock me on my ass. Although even I admit that its probably not helping that I still get up at least 4 times a night between needing to pee and Zeta waking up. Broken sleep ruins me.

But now is the time I need to rally! In the last few weeks of this pregnancy we will have Easter, Zeta’s birthday party, a church conference, mother’s day, a baby sprinkle, Alpha’s birthday, a YLEO party at our home and a bible trivia night I’m hosting for our church. Some of these events will be VERY low key for my own sanity but Zeta’s bday party and the trivia night will take up a lot of me despite the marching orders I have received to delegate!

I will do my best to keep up with everything but at the end of the day if I fall short of my own expectations I have a glorious excuse! Gotta luv a baby bump!

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Why I Feel Inadequate…

Lately I feel like I can’t measure up to my own standards ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I think sleep deprivation has a lot to do with it. I hope! Here are a few of the thoughts running through my mind…

*Why do I keep eating gluten when I know it makes me feel like crap? Am I a gluten addict?! Is it a pregnancy craving? How much damage is this causing my gut? What if I’m destroying my gut lining and can’t absorb the nutrients this little baby needs?!

*Why am I letting the kids watch so much tv? A better mom would shut the tv off regardless of how much sleep she got.

*The kids are just getting to bed NOW?! It’s {insert obscenely late hour} o’clock! Get your shit together woman!

*I’m giving her bologna sandwich for lunch… again. Good job mom. Why do I even buy this crap? Nitrates are going to kill her looong before anything diabetes related and it will be my fault. Bologna is a gateway food and I’m running the gate.

*I didn’t read/study anything even remotely Christian related today. How can I teach Sunday school when I clearly suck at practicing Christianity. I’m a fraud.

*Forgot about the laundry… again. No more excuses! Get it together! What are you going to do when you have 3?!

*Bought meat at the grocery store again. I should be supporting local families and buy our meat from them. Fail.

*and on and on and on….

 

I seriously need a break from my own brain! Suggestions?

 

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